Life of a Stay-at-Home Mom

One may underestimate or feel bad looking at a housewife/stay-at-home mom for having no career on its own. Think again. Being a stay-at-home mom is a FULL-TIME job and should not be looked down upon.

I must admit, I've always imagined myself a a high-powered lawyer, juggling career and family life. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine I will be staying at home, taking care of the kids. I always say to myself: "I don't want to be boring. I want a career and a life on my own!"

But when I got pregnant to my first baby, things changed. Suddenly, my world revolved around her. Seeing her after 9 hard and long months is the best feeling in the world. But then, there's my dream. I went back to law school because for me, fulfilling my dream is a step towards giving my daughter the best life possible. Win-win situation. Until I got pregnant again. That's when I decided to quit law school and focus on the kids instead. Then I realized, maybe my real calling is to be a full-time mom, not a lawyer. I felt bad, of course. Giving up something I really, really want is not easy. But then there's 2 of them. I really have to make a choice, and being a full-time mom is the choice I made.

It's not easy. Not because I'm at home with no academic stuff bothering me, everything else is less complicated. It's not. I am in charge of the household, do the grocery, prepare meals and most importantly, take care of the babies. I have to make sure that their needs and the house's needs are attended to, immediately. I will be the one to bring them to the hospital in case something bad happened. And the good thing about being at home? I get to see the baby's progress everyday! The first step, hear the first word, first laugh, everything! And no amount of money can pay that.

Being a stay-at-home is not bad. Like many other stay-at-home moms, I'm thinking of ways to do something worthwhile even at the comfort of my home. Like getting an online job for example. Not only will my mind work again, I get to earn extra while looking after the kids. I also get to read my overdue books bought years ago. I also learn and discover new things, even though not law-related, through the Internet. I also tried cooking new dishes and baking, something I've been wanting to do ever since. Now that I'm staying at home, I get to experiment and try out something new. And of course, I will be able to bring my daughter to her Gymboree class (where she'll start this week). At least I'll see how she's able to deal with the other kids her age. And if there's one thing this whole stay-at-home mom thing is good at, other than seeing my baby's progress --I get to find myself again. I have time to reflect and reconnect with myself, with no distractions and pressures of school and extracurricular activities.

I may go back and finish law school, or take my Masters or whatever. For now, my focus is my children, the loves of my life.

So the next time you looked down on a stay-at-home mom, DON'T! We do have a career: our children.

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Preparing for Childbirth

Last November 2011, J and I attended childbirth class under Rome Kanapi (she's excellent by the way!) in Ateneo. At first, we only did this to comply with my OB's condition so that J can be with me inside the labor room. But after attending the first session, we really enjoyed the class. We learned a lot, from breathing techniques to prenatal and relaxation exercises to what to prepare on D-day. We were also taught about how to detect labor, maternal anatomy and other information that OBs might forget to mention. We also met other first time couples, who like us, are clueless about pregnancy and preparing for childbirth, and gained some friends. And the best part? freebies! Brands like Mustela, Pigeon, Avent, Safety First, Cradle and Cycles among others gave a demo and samples of their products and even provided us some discounts upon purchase :) Indeed, it was a fun learning experience and attending a childbirth class is definitely a MUST, especially for first time parents :)

Give me a break!

Admit it. Having kids is really handful. It requires a lot of time, attention and patience. Oftentimes, mommies forget (not everyone, I suppose) to take care and give time to theirselves. Well, DONT! Just because you're already a mom, you have an excuse to NOT attend to your personal needs and at times, wants.  IT'S NOT. You don't have to get stuck at home all the time. Dont allow yourself to look 'miserable' by not taking care of yourself. So what if you have kids? Get some time off! You'll get crazy and cranky if you don't. It's not like forgetting your momma duties. But at the very least, still PRIORITIZE. Your kids' needs still comes first. What I'm saying is every mom should not be restricted to take some time off once in a while.

Here's what you can do: Read a book. Get a massage or foot spa. Visit a salon. Watch a movie. Go on a date night with hubby. Try a new restaurant. Buy something for yourself like a simple top or bag. Or walk around the mall if you don't feel like buying anything. Try jogging. Exercise. Enrol in dance or yoga classes. If you just can't leave your kid/s, get a home service and have a spa-like experience. Buy a DVD and watch it at home. Or take a nice, long bath. Cook, bake or at least learn how to. Re-arrange/re-decorate the house. When the baby is asleep, get some sleep too. There are so many things to do, just find time, say once a month, and don't deprive yourself of the little things that will make you happy.

I say, give your self a break! It will even improve your mood. There's no harm in attending to yourself once in a while. You deserve it after all :) 

Thoughts on motherhood

I am a young mom and to be honest, I didn't expect to be put in motherhood situation this early. I have to give up lawschool and weekly nighouts for diapers and baby bottles. Nevertheless, it's all worth it :)

I remember that day when my baby girl was given to me after almost 24 hours in labor. That joy when I held her and saw her for the first time after 9 months inside my tummy. All that back pain, weight gain, massage-less, no chips and soda diet, difficulty breathing turned sleepless nights are forgotten. I didn't cry, unlike what most moms would say, but I was so happy and no words can express how I feel when I first saw her.

But being a mom is not all bed of roses, at least in my point of view. It starts from the day one finds out about the pregnancy and it never ends! Being a mom is about keeping yourself healthy and happy from pregnancy onwards because your baby needs you and is depending on you. Its not just about preparing milk or food but also providing and giving the best to your little ones and being there in their every milestone. But most importantly, it's about SACRIFICE. From waking up in the middle of the night to tend to the baby's needs despite lack of sleep to taking care of them when they're sick to giving up personal wants or needs for the baby's sake, that's what motherhood is all about. It is putting your baby's interest first above everything else. My mom used to say that being a mom is difficult since you have to give up something for yourself. I agree. I already gave up something for my little girl. Though this "something" is really important to me, I know that it will never  be at par with the time I spent and will be spending with my child. I know that in every step of her development, no matter how little it may be, I am there to witness it and I'm happy I have the luxury to see it. And those moments can never be replaced :)

So cheers to all the moms out there for all the sacrifices and hardwork to give their child/ren everything they deserve! Be proud! :)